Friday, April 2, 2010

If You Give A Girl A Chainsaw....

If you give a girl a chainsaw,
she might trim up a tree.
She'll cut off all the branches,
and make them just her size.
She'll throw them in a pile,
and light them with a match.
She'll watch the flames go high,
as the pile gets smaller.
So next time that you have a tree
hanging really low,
Just remember what I told you,
and so won't be up a creek.
If you give a girl a chainsaw,
she might trim up a tree.

This is my own crazy attempt at poetry. It may not win any awards but it makes me smile.
Earlier this week, on one of those beautiful sunny days I decided that I need to be outside doing something, and since it was still too we to be in the garden, I thought I would do some clean-up around the farm. Starting with this tree. I do 99.9% of the mowing around our house, which means I know where all the problem areas are around the yard. As you can see there is a huge branch that is half way on the ground, but even if that branch wasn't there the rest of the limbs hang so low that they would scratch you up and whack you in the face every time you tried to mow under it. So it's not a pleasant tree to mow near. So the other afternoon when it was so very nice outside, I got in the mood to chop something down and this tree was on the top of my list, cause before long I'm gonna need to start mowin' the yard again and I don't want to have to try an mow around it again.

So I grabbed the chainsaw, my gloves and a pair of sunglasses and started goin' to town on the tree. So for those of you that know some thing about trees this is a Hedge Tree or by its correct name an Osage Orange Tree. For those of who knowing the name doesn't mean a hill of beans, all you need to know is Hedge Tree = Devil Tree!! They get their common name, hedge tree, from what their original purpose was. They were used in fence rows dividing fields and were kinda like a living fence. Their branches sprawl out in a million different directions, and they have small devil-like thorns all over the branches. So when they were planted in a row close together they would bake this barrier that nothing would want to go through. They also make a great wind break from those crazy Kansas winds. So, stupid me, I didn't get a long sleeve shirt and was to lazy to walk back up to the house to get one, so by the time I was done cutting the branches off the 'devil tree' my arms looked like they had been in a fight with chainsaw. Oh well, it's my own fault!
Here's a shot of what it looked like halfway through the process.  It's looking better already.  
There were a few casualties through out the process....a few tears were cried. FYI - that dripping white sap is nasty sticky stuff so don't touch or you will be sorry!
But this tree is one tough cookie tree. It has survived previous battles with a saw, so I am sure it will survive this one as well.
The worst part about this job was that Caleb was off doing something else so this meant I had to drag off all the brush by myself....yuck!!! I though it was, I make the mess and he cleans it up.

Oh how much better it looks, now that it's all said and done!
Even a pile of wood....for the wood furnace we don't have. Actually I will probably donate this pile to Caleb folks for their fire place next winter or maybe if we ever go camping take it along and use it then.

So at the end of the battle of Janet vs. Tree, I win hands and limbs down!


  1. You have a lot more green than we do. I am in the middle of cleaning up the tree row along the highway. I've got almost 1/2 a mile to do. I'm not brave enough to use the chainsaw, but I do a lot of work with a saws-all! The grass has never been mowed around the trees since TNT has lived there (15 years) so the fallen branches are hid down in there. I'll get it done some day, but the little I've done looks so nice.

    Oh and since I also do 99.9% of the mowing I have to go around and "trim" the low hanging trees too.

  2. Carrie, I thought you might feel my pain, but it sounds like you have a lot more clean up to do than I have.

  3. When we moved to our place the neighbors told us no one had touched it in 50+ years. It showed--there are trees and underbrush EVERYWHERE! I love my chainsaw too! It always seems like such an accomplishment to get something like that cleaned up. Good job Janet!!

  4. That tree looks mcuh better now just come trim the one tree I have at my house then go to my parents hows so I will have an easier time mowing this summer!!!!!!!! LOL

  5. You go, girl! Great job, Janet. I'm not "allowed" to use the chainsaw... wah :-( I may have to try it anyway sometime. I see a lot of trees around here I could practice on :) I've always thought it looked like fun, and a great way to take out frustration!! -Tammy

  6. Hedge also = hot fire in woodstove on cold winter day! AND long stinking thorns that will welt a finger if poked! Love the post!! So glad you stopped by my blog! I've got you added and will be checking back in!

    It's always a blessing to meet new friends and you're not that far away!!


  7. Carrie @

    First, Im totally impressed with your chainsaw abilities. I dont have the arm strength to lift it twice, much less cut an entire branch down. Awesome work!

    Second--not to get sappy (no pun intended)--but doesnt this remind you of Gods pruning in our own lives. Branches of sin get in the way of Gods work in our lives, so He just trims those parts off. Those healed over tree knots remind me of some deep-pruning God has done on me.

    Beautiful picture story.